A Battle Cry for Peace

Have you sometimes found yourself going from peaceful to impatient, even disgusted; from feeling kind to feeling angry within minutes?  Sometimes it doesn't take much:  like when someone sounds demanding, blaming, stuck, uncooperative, or disinterested for the millionth time, or after a decade of struggling with repeated conflicts.
 
Good news is we are not our emotions, we are not our thoughts, even these reactions do not define who we are.  We are having a very real human experience, fully experiencing whatever emotions arise, subject to the hundreds of thoughts that drop in every day.  Because it's uncomfortable on any side of these reactions, it's important to take care of ourselves and practice responding in a way that can restore connection, compassion, and improved communication.

As we know, there are distinct times that it is overwhelming, to be sure!  It can feel like you might not be able to withstand the avalanche of fear, of worry, of grief, not be able to navigate the next crisis that is a real experience of loving a child who struggles with substance use.  What can you do when this happens?
 
First, I invite you to accept that this is the reality of things, and it will happen.  Please develop a willingness to at least, whenever possible, NOT go to war with it. War continues the kind of battle that we can prevent or de-escalate. We can learn and practice ways to interrupt this heartbreaking battle. 
 
If there is to be a battle, let there be a battle cry to hold ourselves in gentle compassion of our human experience.  Let there be a battle cry to feel, to comfort and care for ourselves, especially when it feels like we're in a war with ourselves, with circumstances, with people, with systems.  The battle cry is calling out for us to give ourselves some much needed TLC. 
 
Here are some battle cry ideas to armor yourself with awareness, with compassion, with tender loving care:

• Invite a willingness to allow the emotions, to sit with them, to hold yourself as you feel them with caring intention.  I promise the energy will shift on its own.  It will lose its intensity enough for you to transition and be better able to consider choices that are presented when you're clear and calm.
• Breathe my dear, breathe.  Inhale through your nose for 4 breaths, hold your precious breath at the top for 4 counts, then exhale through you mouth for a count of 8 as if you're slowly blowing out candles.
• Imagine the wisest part of you, the one you are or could be at your very, very best. Give yourself an inner hug from that part of you.  Recall and affirm those qualities that are true parts of you and imagine you holding the fearful one in you with so much TLC until you feel safe. Breathe into this inner hug.  Let it fill your dear heart.
• Be willing to allow the co-existence of the many thoughts or emotions that will come and go, the hope, the fear, any and all of it.  Your intention to be the one who notices and allows it, even to welcome it, will show your fearful one you are ok, and you are capable of caring for yourself.  This practice will also reinforce your wisest one, and declare that you can and are showing up for you, especially when your dear self needs it the most.

You need you.  Your child needs you.  We all need each other.  This is how Love moves in us and through us.  We all need some Love don't we?  

I honor the Love that you are, the Love in you.  I honor your fears too.  They can guide you to truth, when they are questioned. When in truth, fear is transformed from misunderstanding to understanding and into the awareness of Love where peace can be found. I'll be sharing a gift with you, a healing session on November 18 to do this, so watch out for those emails soon. 

To support you with more and something that can enhance your healing practices, I invite you to download my free guide "How to Get Clear on Next Steps when Your Child Struggles with Substance Use".   The guide offers you a way to build a foundation that can enhance your ability to identify and practice much needed skills of connection and communication, and especially when it gets challenging. It's something I use pretty much every day to re-mind myself how I want to show up and to identify how I'm going to show up more peaceful and lovingly pro-active. Click here to get your (free) copy.  And please share the link with friends who may benefit from the guide also.  
 
Let's do Love together!  Let there be peace!  Sometimes it must and can co-exist with the challenges we face.  Let peace begin with each of us.  Are you with me?  Say "yes" to being with yourself and choose Peace.

I'm with you!  

Love wins here!

Ps.  Do you know someone who may enjoy reading my monthly newsletter, Love wins!?  New friends can join our Love wins! community by clicking here. 

Pps.  To get a jump on registration for Nov 18 Prescription for Peace, just click here. 

Ppps.   Again, to download the free guide, just click here: "How to Get Clear on Next Steps when Your Child Struggles with Substance Use".